I was working last night and in comes a guy with no money wanting a cappuccino. He promises to have money in a half an hour, my first impression is that he is a few fruit loops short of the whole bowl and I pass him over to Patrick (who works day shift) to handle and go off to continue organizing for the night shift. He is quite young, has shaggy unkempt hair, dressed well but hippy and he has a pink guitar with a heart shaped hole in it. He seems cute, harmless and definitely touched by the fairies.
I pass his table and he is writing a list written in big letters ‘THINGS I WANT’, underneath in descending order ’sunshine’, ‘a job’, ‘world peace’, ‘close all pubs’ and one more I didn’t get a glimpse of. He was getting this list ready to hang up someplace, industriously sellotaping it to another piece of paper with various business cards stuck to it but he wouldn’t tell me where. Then he left without paying for his coffee.
Apparently he was fine until a few years ago when he went off a journey of the mind to seas uncharted on the ‘normal’ social scale. Maybe he will make his way back, maybe he will go further.
The understanding I always get from genuinely mad people is the place between the state of normal and madness. They remind me to get in touch with that place again. Where rules are words written on paper and meanings tossed around like confetti in the wind ready to be used for whatever you would like them to be. Also what strikes me is the utter seriousness with which they believe the trip they are on. It makes me reflect on my own life, what trip am I on that I am utterly investing in that is madness? what beliefs am I endorsing in myself that I could drop and be happier?
I dropped one recently a few months ago which the guy last night reminded me of. The need to be doing something constantly, to be someone to receive worth, to achieve to be happy. I had better look at it again and refine it.